This is a dog tale, and it's a mystery. It's about a dog who did something bad. The dog is
our dog, and he did this bad thing many times. But nobody saw him do it. And because
we have two dogs, he got away with it.
For awhile.
My tale begins several years ago, during the
winter. This particular winter, it rained hard, for days. There were rain puddles
everywhere. But my story isn’t about a rain puddle. It’s about a puddle of
dog pee, in the laundry room, in front of the dog door.
Yep, we have a dog door. Our two dogs,
Hercules (Hercy) and Shaka, can go outside whenever they want. Which means any accidents are no accident.
When I found the first puddle of dog pee,
I stormed into the family room to find my husband, Steve. "Hercules PEED
in the laundry room!"
"Wait...what???"
"I just found a big puddle of dog
pee, right in front of the dog door. Hercules obviously didn't want to go
outside in the rain, so he peed in the laundry room!"
"You didn't see him do it?"
Steve asked. "How do you know it was Hercules, and not Shaka?"
Was he kidding?
We have two dogs. They have as much in common as Lady Gaga and the Pope. Don’t
get me wrong – they’re best buds. But they’re nothing alike, and only one of
them would pee in the laundry room. Shaka (he's the one on the right) does his best to
follow the rules. Hercules, on the other hand, makes his own rules. He does
what he wants. And apparently his wants include peeing in comfort.
Steve refused to believe it. Hercy is
Steve's favorite dog, just like Steve is Hercy’s favorite human. And in this case, Steve had Hercy’s
back (as well as other parts).
The pee-puddles appeared for weeks, then
for months - every time it rained. Steve insisted I couldn't punish Hercules,
because I couldn't prove he did it. But I knew. Deep in my heart, I knew. I knew
every time I cleaned up a puddle of dog pee. I got madder and madder.
Finally, one day, I caught him in the act. I walked by and saw Hercules standing in the laundry room, peeing.
But that's not the whole story. The truth is, I didn't see Hercules; I saw his tail. I saw his tail, his back legs and rear end, inside the dog door. I did NOT see
his head or his front legs, because they were outside the dog door.
I watched: Hercules stood perfectly still,
half-in and half-out.
Peeing.
That’s when I screamed. The pent-up
frustration I'd built up for months was released in one blood-curdling
cry: "HERCULES!!!!"
He shot out the dog door.
Steve came running, wondering if someone
had been killed. I told him I'd caught Hercules! I'd been right! It was
Hercules who didn't want to pee in the rain!
I wanted to gloat, but Steve and I both
ended up laughing as we guessed what Hercules must've been thinking: “I
can see outside, feel outside, and hear outside. I must be
outside!” Meanwhile, part of him (ahem!) was warm, dry and comfy.
I could finally discipline the culprit, and he stopped. And that's the end of my dog tale, and the mystery that was solved by a dog tail.
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